Insomniac Mind...A Spiritual World

"And that about wraps it up. God is strong, and he wants you strong. So take everything the Master has set out for you, well-made weapons of the best materials. And put them to use so you will be able to stand up to everything the Devil throws your way. This is no afternoon athletic contest that we’ll walk away from and forget about in a couple of hours. This is for keeps, a life-or-death fight to the finish against the Devil and all his angels." Ephesians 6: 10-12 - The Message

I don't much about the spiritual world except to say that it exists. This has been on my mind repetitively lately and I stumbled across this verse from Ephesians in an online app yesterday. It's played over and over in my head - you see, lately I've had this horrible insomnia. I can't sleep at night. Even when I'm tired or fake it, I just lie in bed thinking. And when you have nothing but darkness and your thoughts, your mind plays out various scenarios and thoughts patterns. Often at night, I just pray. For anyone and anything I can think of. But sometimes I just let my thoughts run free. And my mind has tended to go to the spiritual world lately. The realm above (?) us. Around us.

I think that the devil has done this thing to people...a trick that is like no other. It's where he draws his power. It's a quote from The Usual Suspects apparently on a quick Google search: "The greatest trick the devil ever pulled was convincing the world he didn't exist." Yes.

And sometimes I think Christians forget this the most. Me included.

I don't know for certain. I haven't done theological research. I haven't taken classes or done any studying on this topic, except to let it play over and over in my mind. I'm a visual person though and when I think something through, I envision a battle with swords. I envision illness in our body the same way. There is this massive spiritual battle going around our bodies. I can feel it.

I see it in the little things everyday.

We haven't been to church for many weeks in a row now because of skating and dance commitments. This past Sunday, it was time! A free Sunday and to church we would go...my soul needed that spiritual charge. At 2 am Sunday morning? Francesca woke inconsolable with an earache which resulted in an emergency room visit. Bedtime for me ended up being 5 am, and despite regular insomnia, that's still too late for me to get to bed and get to church for 10. And so we stayed home. Again. Why 2 am? Why an emergency room visit when Francesca hadn't once complained of an earache in four days of sickness?

I know.

I'm working to be aware of this battle everyday. We're human and we fail (hello Jesus!). I just really think that being aware of this battle is so important and that sometimes in the everyday-ness of everyday, we forget that there is this ultimate battle going on. Way bigger than we know. Way bigger than the menial everyday things. This really is for keeps...a life or death battle to the finish. And I'm thankful to know which side I'm on.